The Secret to Change? Stop Trying to Be Someone Else

I had one of those beautiful "aha" moments this morning where my brain finally landed on a quote that just clicks. As your coach, specialising in finding that inner peace and genuine wellbeing, I see so many people completely worn out from the effort of trying to be what they think they should be.

That’s why this quote from Beisser is a total game-changer:

“Change occurs when one becomes what he is, not when he tries to become what he is not.”

Seriously, read that one more time. It’s the ultimate permission slip.

Girl On a Lake Reaching Out to Her Reflection

We live in a world that constantly pushes us to change, improve, level up, and become the next best version of ourselves. But Beisser flips the script: the real transformation doesn't happen when you try to force yourself into a new, foreign mold. It happens when you finally stop fighting and fully accept the magnificent, quirky, flawed, and completely unique person you already are.

Authenticity isn’t about being perfect; it’s about being real. It's about dropping the act, ditching the comparison game, and creating a life that actually feels good—because it’s built on your true foundation, not someone else’s blueprints.

Ready to make that shift? You don't need a huge life overhaul. You just need a few small, consistent practices.

3 Tips to Just Be You

These are tiny, manageable ways to give your authenticity a massive boost every single day.

1. Take the Gut-Check Test.

Your gut feeling is your body’s truth detector. We’re taught to rationalize and think through everything, but often, the deepest wisdom lives right in your stomach. When you're faced with a choice - big or small (a new project, a social invite, even what to watch on TV) - pause for three seconds and ask yourself: "Does this feel like a 'full-body yes' or a dragging 'ugh, maybe'?" If it's the latter, that’s your authentic self telling you no. Start small by honoring that "no" on minor things. The more you listen to your inner compass, the louder and clearer it gets.

2. Unfollow to Unfold (Yes, Really).

Let’s be honest: our social media feeds are comparison factories. If you scroll through Instagram and consistently walk away feeling like you need to change your house, your body, your career, or your entire personality, then those accounts are toxic for your authenticity. Your goal isn't to look like everyone else; it's to look like you. Hit that unfollow button without guilt. Create a digital space that celebrates your unique journey, not one that constantly shames you for not fitting in.

3. Flaunt Your Flaws (They’re Your Superpowers).

We all have those little things we try to hide: a weird obsession with organizing spoons, a loud laugh, a super nerdy hobby, or an emotional sensitivity you try to suppress. News flash: those "flaws" are what make you memorable, interesting, and deeply human. When you stop editing yourself and let those quirky parts show, you invite deeper, more genuine connections. Authenticity is about saying, "Yup, this is me! Take it or leave it." Spoiler alert: the people who matter will love it.

Remember, becoming who you are is the least exhausting thing you'll ever do. It's not about effort; it's about ease. It’s about letting the real you finally take the lead.

What's one thing you're going to stop trying to be this week so you can embrace who you already are? Let me know in the comments!